


Leave the Fallen Where They Lay

by AXEe



Series: Family Matters [26]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: CJ has a big heart, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-19 16:40:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11317458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AXEe/pseuds/AXEe
Summary: The worst wounds are the ones that can't be seen\





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Another addition to the "Family Matters"-verse! Enjoy! :=)

******

CJ blinked as she sat up, frowning as she heard more thumps and bangs coming from her parents bedroom. Squinting, she x-rayed the wall, sitting up at the sight of Astra seemingly cowering behind the bed

“Damn it! Not again,” throwing back the covers, CJ quickly tipped toed to the master bedroom, peering around the half open door “Mother?” she asked. Slowly pushing the door open further, she cringed at the sight of Astra crouched next to the bed, a lamp clutched tightly in her hands as she breathed hard

[Get inside!] she suddenly hissed to CJ in frantic Kryptonese [hurry! They can’t be far behind]

Mentally cringing, CJ hurried inside, crawling over Astra’s side on her elbows, finally straightening up to lean against the bed

“Mother,” she began softly “do you know where you are?”

[Strad.] Astra answered, suddenly gasping and ducking as the light of a car on the street passed by the window [damn it! Sentinel patrols! Down, down!] she hissed

“Mother, this isn’t Strad, OK? You’re on Earth, remember?” CJ tried in English. Astra turned to look at her, scowling

[You’re working for them!] she suddenly hissed, with a growl she suddenly lunged, pinning CJ to the floor [where’s your weapon, spy?] she demanded as she began tearing at CJ’s t-shirt [where?!]

[I don’t have a weapon,] CJ replied in Kryptonese, keeping her voice low and steady [Mother, it’s _me_ , it’s CJ, your daughter. Do you remember me? Connor Jeremiah Danvers?] she slowly held up her hands, fingers splayed [no weapons, no blades, no blows, leave the fallen where they lie] she recited, recalling the phrase used by ancient Kryptonians to announce the end of hostilities

Slowly, Astra stopped, blinking, once, twice, seeming to come back to herself

“CJ?” she asked in English, awkwardly untangling herself from her daughter

“Welcome back” CJ sighed as she sat up

“Did I…?” Astra began “did I…hurt you?”

“I’m fine,” CJ answered as she leaned against the bed “you haven’t had a flashback that bad in years,” she noted “what happened?”

“I don’t know,” Astra sighed, burying her face in her hands “I just know that if…if I’d hurt you…”

“I wouldn’t have blamed you,” CJ dismissed “so, where were you this time?” she asked

“Somewhere I’d rather not revisit”

“You know, talking about it helps, no matter who you’re talking to” CJ pointed out

Astra slowly let out a shuddering breath

“You shouldn’t hear this,” she began “you’re still a child”

“I’m _sixteen_ , Mother,” CJ chuckled “I think I passed ‘childhood’ at least a decade ago,” she sighed as her smart-ass remark fell flat “look,” she sighed “you don’t have to talk to me, but you should talk to someone, even if its only Mom”

“We’d been assigned to help the local government put down a rebellion,” Astra began suddenly “our first week there we didn’t see any signs of the rebels,” she continued “then, on the third week, we were on patrol in the mountains outside the capital and came under heavy fire. We lost half the unit in the first salvo, and dozens more were wounded. I found myself hiding in a small…crevasse in the rock face. I was still a colonel then, young, and, oh so inexperienced. Anyway, I was cut off from the rest of the unit, when I hear a sentinel patrol—automated defense robots sent into high-risk areas to assess conditions—now I didn’t know who these Sentinels were reporting to, if I exposed my position I could’ve handed myself right over to the rebels. So I stayed where I was, huddled against a rock, shaking in fear. About…five or so minutes later, I could hear the rebels engage our own people, and I could hear them coming towards me. So, I readied my weapon and charged out…,”

She took another breath

“The rebels in front of me were… _children_ ,” she continued “they all couldn’t have been older than twelve at the most, each of them holding a plasma rifle that was as large as they were”

“So…what’d you do?”

“I couldn’t do it,” Astra shook her head “even though one of the surviving generals was _screaming_ at me to shoot, I _couldn’t_ just…shoot a child,” she took another breath “as I turned out, the so-called ‘rebels’ were actually the survivors from an ethnic purge the government had instituted against a small tribe that lived in the mountains. Those dozen or children standing in front of me with guns were practically that was left of this tribe, who the government had wanted exterminated simply because the tribe was discouraging the tourists,” she chuckled bitterly “they called in Krypton’s military, claimed that the entire planet was on the brink of civil war, all because they started exterminating a peaceful tribe of people to encourage more tourists”

“So, what happened?”

“The children were eventually adopted by various kind-hearted families from across the galaxy, the High Council sanctioned the government of Strad, and less than a month later the same tribe that they had tried to exterminate staged a coup and overthrew the government,” she took a breath “but, to this day, I still wonder….what would have happened if I had followed orders? If I had pulled that trigger? What then?”

“A bloodbath,” CJ answered bluntly “Mother,” she took Astra’s hand “you couldn’t have known, no one could have, I’m sure the government of Strad made sure that the real facts were well-covered up”

“Oh they did,” Astra hissed “even with an eyewitness testimony from one of the children, even with DNA evidence, and video proof, they still denied it, they either denounced it as the actions of a rouge group, not affiliated with them, or a misunderstanding, that the full facts weren’t being shown”

“I’ll just bet they did,” CJ growled “but,” she turned to her mother “you couldn’t have known, you were just doing your duty, protecting Krypton, protecting people who can’t protect themselves, as you always have”

“Oh, CJ,” Astra surged forward and pulled her into a firm embrace “thank you, my dear”

“Any time”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here's another chapter to "Leave the Fallen Where They Lay" that no one asked for! Enjoy! :=)

******

Alex groaned as she dragged her stiff body down the hall towards the apartment. Nearly a full twelve hours stuck in a DEO van on a stakeout only to find out that their target had been arrested earlier that night by the NCPD on a separate charge. Suffice to say, J'onn wasn't happy, and the last Alex had seen of him he was yelling at the police commissioner.

Putting that thought out of her head, Alex slipped her key into the lock as quietly as possible, quietly pushing open the door and slipping inside She stopped and frowned at the sight of CJ sitting on the couch devouring a tub of ice cream while watching something on the _History Channel_

"What are you still doing up? it's...," Alex looked at her watch "...late" she finally finished

"I think you should talk to Mother" CJ replied

"Why? What happened?" Alex asked as she unloaded her bag and moved to the fridge to find something more substancel to eat than beef jerky and cheap potato chips

"Mom," CJ stated firmly, Alex turned, frowning at the rather serious expression on her daughter's face "I really think that you should talk to her"

Slowly Alex nodded, suddenly sensing that this was serious

"OK, yeah, sure," she shut the fridge and moved to the bedroom, gently easing the door open "hey" she said softly

"Hey" Astra replied from where she sat on the bed, knees drawn up to her chest

"What happened?" Alex asked as she gently eased down onto the bed

"I took a visit to somewhere I'd rather not go again"

"Flashback?"

"Hmm"

"Where to?"

"Strad"

"Damn," Alex sighed, raking a hand through her hair "so...CJ had to see that huh?"

"She did wonderfully," Astra praised "I was in deep, Alex, I honestly thought that I was still back there, that she was some sort of...enemy spy, but," she shook her head "she kept her cool, got me focused, woke me out of that nightmare"

"That settles it," Alex declared "we're getting her a pony"

Astra snorted out a breathless laugh "She doesn't like ponies"

"So? We'll make her like it," Alex declared, she gave her wife a weak smile "so, how are you holding up?"

"I'm...better," Astra nodded "not great, but...better"

"Is there anything that I can do?" Alex asked

"Just...hold me?" Astra pleaded

Alex didn't reply in words, merely shifted so that she sitting behind Astra, wrapping her arms around Astra's shoulders and gently easing her back between her legs, enveloping her completely, trying drive the darkness away with just her presence and touch

"Do you want me to call Kara?" she asked quietly

"No," Astra shook her head "not yet, anyway. For now, just hold me"

"Always" Alex whispered in reply...

**END**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anybody who wants me to tack on a third chapter, just let me know :=)

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you thought :=)


End file.
